Posts Tagged With: appointment

Sinus Infection and Hope

Posted on November 9, 2013 by Nahleen

Sinus Infection.

Infection.

Infection.

That’s what I feel like I’ve heard over and over again over the past few years especially. Perhaps I don’t hear it as much as I used to but for awhile I think I was just one big walking infection of one kind or another.

And today was no exception. The only difference is, I haven’t been to see a doctor about an infection for 8 months. I think I’ve hit a new record. If I’ve felt sickies coming they have been fought off by my own body and Chiropractic adjustments have helped a lot too.

So I called my doctor’s office this morning at 9am when they opened and couldn’t reach anyone till 9:30am. Turns out their phones were ringing off the hook for at least a half hour straight with people calling like crazy trying to get squeezed in for an appointment because so many people had the same symptoms I have had. They have had the puffy swollen face, the cough starting, the sinuses filling up, the fever, the feeling of the head being squeezed off, sneezing, etc. And I found out later from my Physician Assistant that most of these infections have started with allergies and become an infection. She also said that most of her patients have said it has hit hard and fast and feel like they’ve been hit by a bus. Well, yes, I kinda have felt like my head was hit by a bus actually.

Yes. Ugh. Ow. All that stuff.

I was miserable today. I’ve been in a funk and not feeling good as you all know by now. I tend to get really upset when I get sick because I feel as though I am sick enough with MS and lupus. I really don’t have anymore room for any other yucky symptoms and discomfort you know? I really don’t want to be sick anymore. I would love to get a break. I was just icky mentally and physically.

Yet as I drove to my appointment this afternoon I took a deep (as deep as I can when I have a tight chest congestion issue) breath and looked to my left at the ocean. I love this drive. I love the area I get to drive in to get to this doctor’s office. I love the area itself where it’s located. To be honest, it’s one of the main reasons I go to this doctor.

Anyway, I looked at the ocean and its sparkles and then looked to my right to the cliffs that so clearly mark PCH (Pacific Coast Highway) and I think it’s then that I found myself more in the Present again. It’s hard to stay Present when I don’t feel good. My head goes all over the place into the future, the past, backwards, inside out, sideways, and usually feels buried under bricks of ick. It was the ocean and the sunlight’s shadow play on the cliffs that struck me. There I was sitting in my car and feeling stronger than I have in awhile. I sat a bit more upright. I started feeling inside the rest of my body and realizing that this may be the first time I wasn’t completely overtaken by so many symptoms from all my ailments that I didn’t know what was bothering me. I just knew it all sucked. And I realized, I AM improving. I am feeling a bit stronger. This time I’m really going to the doctor to address the sickies. I don’t need to address all the MS, lupus, IBS and all the other symptoms that are completely overwhelming me. And for the first time in about 2 days I started to feel a bit more hope and positivity. That I’d make it past this.

I always find myself in this trap in my head. As if I’m never gonna get through the next wave of whatever is making me feel crappy. It feels permanent. Like I’m doomed. Quite often, though, the horrible wave passes and I pull out of that and go to the “normal wave” of discomfort.

But it was the ocean, the cliffs and sunlight that pulled me out just a bit. They gave me something to hold onto. And then as I talked to my PA at the appointment she helped me remember the progress I’m making and how far I’ve come compared to 3.5 years ago. She has always been there for me. She has coached me and encouraged me and also been able to take me seriously and with so much compassion. She reminded me that we are all human. That as humans we get sick. This is almost a normal thing to go through, this sinus infection. This is gonna happen. But she also acknowledged that yes it would be really nice if I could get a break. She knows how much I’ve been through.

So I’m now stocked up with antibiotics, mucinex, juices, water, tissues and anything else that will help me get better. I fought off this infection for 2 weeks on my own. THAT is a victory. This all still sucks but if I can pull my head out of the muck I can see where the hope is.

And as I’ve read before and I just love this quote:

HOPE: Hold On Pain Ends

It’s hope that keeps me going. So I will hold on.

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Life Interrupted…Again

Posted on November 7, 2013 by Nahleen

I’ve been sitting here on the couch. That is all. And yet there seems to be movement going on in my body. Movement of sickies taking over. The sinuses are getting fuller. The chest is getting a bit tighter and the cough is happening more and not just a little bit. This time it’s not looser like this morning. It’s getting tighter and the cough is turning more into a “bark” as I’ve called it. And this is just as I’m sitting here.

The cough came on apparently just for fun at about 10am this morning. It was more like a tickle. It was looser like it has been if I start to feel sick at all these days. Things have changed a lot since I started seeing my Chiropractor earlier this year and it’s been helping to boost my immune system with each session. Usually when I’ve felt sick now it starts up just a bit and then an adjustment or my own body fight it off.

Actually, I thought that’s what I was doing last week. I can’t really describe how I felt last week. I felt a wee bit sick and it was kicking my whole body into a bit of an edge-of-a-flare-overdrive. I was also exhausted. So I did a lot of sleeping and seemed to finally fight it off by the end of the week. And then yesterday what I believe are allergies, started.

This is my typical sick path. It starts with just getting that “pre-sick” feeling. Hard to describe but I’m guessing you know what I’m talking about. Then it comes on heavy, starts as allergies and immediately transforms into a full on infection. Been doing that pretty much my whole life off and on. I’m very sensitive to stuff. Stick me in a bubble and I swear I’d still get sick. It’s ridiculous.

So I started taking care of my almost chronic infections with a Pulmonologist almost 2 years ago and he helped me turn a corner to a much better version of “better”. There were actually breaks in between infections. And then earlier this year I started seeing a Chiropractor who has helped me keep the sickies away at least 6 times. Well not this time.

I saw him today. So my “allergy sickies” started yesterday…again. And they have been relentless. And then this morning the cough started at about 10am. I saw my Chiropractor at about 12pm. I told him about it and he said, “Well it sounds like you need an immune boosting Chiropractic adjustment”. I agreed. I felt much better from the adjustment. I start to take a walk outside again after the adjustment and the here come the full sinuses. Here comes the cough. They picked right up where they started.

So I’m thinking at this point in the afternoon that perhaps the adjustment dragged out the sickies. Perhaps I’ll be feeling a bit worse before feeling better. Well OK.

PERHAPS.

But at about 5pm I wasn’t thinking too much about it as I rested on the couch and debated getting up to feed Cleo and perhaps have dinner myself and then do some paperwork…

UNTIL I COULD FEEL THE INFECTION MOVING INTO MY BODY AND TAKING OVER.

It’s pretty much what it felt like as I sat there.

This is my LIFE.

LIFE INTERRUPTED…AGAIN.

So hard. So frustrating. So uncool. I’m trying to get some things done. I have my parents visiting in 4 days. I had plans this weekend. Yes I have learned to be flexible but that doesn’t mean I’m happy about it. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t get in the way.

Yet again I have to STOP.

STOP.

My body needs me to give it love. My poor body. My poor mind. My mind had other plans. There is life happening around me. I get so tired of resting. I get so tired of drinking and taking yucky medications and teas and special concoctions in order to TRY to feel better. I get so tired of feeling crappy. I have symptoms 24/7 of some sort. They have not stopped for at least 11 years. There is always some kind of discomfort going on in my body.

I have MS, lupus and IBS as my main crap.

THAT SHOULD BE ENOUGH.

But it isn’t. ‘Tis the season for getting sick. I’ll need to stay up tomorrow morning after feeding my Cleo Kitty and call my doctor’s office to try to get squeezed in for the day.

ON A FRIDAY.

Yuck.

I’ve found myself in a lot more acceptance in these almost 11 years since my multiple sclerosis diagnosis but I really just want it all to stop bothering me to be honest. I am tired of not feeling good. I am tired of all of it. I am tired of having a disability. I am tired. This is my life.

LIFE INTERRUPTED…AGAIN.

Don’t get me wrong. I know I’m still living. I know I can still have a life when I’m sick. But so much of it has to stop. I need to rest. I can’t be going out a lot. I can’t be using my brain too much or I get fatigued. We all know what it’s like to be sick. We have to really stop everything in order to get better. It’s just the way it is.

And I’m told I can work. Well tomorrow morning I need to try to get in to see a doctor. That doctor would probably tell me to be out sick for a few days. This can happen anytime and for numerous reasons for my body. It is not that easy to work. I’m not employable right now and that can really upset me if I think about it too much. I need to see doctors, I need to rest and try to recover, I need to deal with crappy bills and insurance, I need to have medical tests done and I need to have time to be me…

Last week I fought what is probably this same sicky bug and didn’t do much for almost a week. This week has been much better but here I go again. I’m trying to have a life flow here and get some things done.

But my body needs love and attention.

It needs to be Priority.

Again.

And so now that my sinuses continue to fill up and the cough hurts me when I breathe as I write this I will stop writing.

Because yes, my life has been interrupted again.

 

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Doctors: Please Take ME Into Consideration

Posted on June 2, 2013 by Nahleen

Full Name: Nahleen Virginia (Knight) Blake. Knight is my Maiden Name. Where did Nahleen come from? Well funny you should ask. I’m sure I’ll have to repeat to you over and over how to say it and how to spell it but let’s get it right the first time. What’s the significance of Virginia? It’s my Grandmother’s Name.

Birth Date: 5/28/77. Thanks! Yes I just turned 36. Uh huh. I’m aware of what 36 means. Wait, what does it mean? Do I dare ask?

Male/Female: I’ll let you guess.

Phone Number: Oh great now you’re gonna bug me all the time.

Any Other Good Numbers to Call?: Nope. And even if there were some I wouldn’t give them to you because you’d chase after me and I’d get no peace. And no you are NOT getting my work number. I made the mistake of telling you that number before and you kept calling me there. Um hi. I’m busy there.

Address: Great. You might stalk me. You’ll at least be sending me bills here. Why else would you want it? Why do I want to give this to you?

Is This a Good Billing Address?: Knew it. It’s all about the $.

Emergency Contact Phone Number: ACK! What’s gonna happen here? There’s gonna be an Emergency here? What if I have no one? And if I give you someone, will you call them every time you can’t reach me? What if that person is across the country? How will they know where I am? Great, now they’ll be worried.

Weight: Does that really matter? Is this any indication of anything? There is no black and white here.

Height: 5’Short–according to my Chiropractor I should be 5’5″ someday as long as I keep going to get adjustments/treatments from him.

Usual Blood Pressure Reading: As if I’m gonna tell you if it’s high. Uh huh. But you’ll take it here in the midst of White Coat Land and freak me out EVERY TIME and take that as a regular reading. Oh you want me to check it at home to get a more accurate reading? How will that be accurate again? I’ll know when I’m gonna be doing it and it will go up.

Usual Body Temperature: 97.5 but you won’t believe me so when you check my temperature and see that it’s 98.6 you’ll say that’s normal and I’ll say it’s high for me and you’ll pass it off.

Hair Color: Well now that’s a good question. Some kind of purple since March 2012.

Hair Type: Pretty dang curly. It’s really short right now.

Eye Color: Blue and to me my eyes are tiny. I also wear glasses so it’s hard to tell they’re as blue as they are.

Birthplace: Homestead, FL (Does that really matter?)

Where I’m From: Kingston, NH

Where I Live Now: Los Angeles, CA

Grow Up With Both Parents?: Yes. I’m blessed to have done so. However, growing up with Single Parents wouldn’t make me less than.

How Old Are They?: None of your business.

Siblings?: Yes. An older sister.

How Old is Your Sibling?: Isn’t that Private? I already said she was older.

Employed?: No. What’s your point? Thanks for reminding me.

Insurance?: Yes. What if I said no?

Are you the Insured? The Primary Card Holder?: HUH?

Primary Insurance?: Ummm…

Secondary Insurance?: WHAT THE?! Leave me alone!

Insurance Information (and everything you didn’t even know you needed to know…): OK. Let me just dig through my purse and wallet and FIND that all for you. Didn’t I just give you my Insurance card? Isn’t it all on there?

Driver License Number: Geez. Nosy! And didn’t I just give you my ID? Isn’t that what this is?

Social Security Number: None of your business. Stop snooping around. I think I need to report you.

Disability?: Meaning what? Yes I have Disability Coverage but don’t get me started about all of that. Am I Disabled? YES! OK?! I think that’s in the mind of the beholder.

Married? Single? Divorced? Domestic Partner?: What does that matter?

If Yes to Married, what’s your Spouse’s Name?: What if I’m not married? I feel like crap now.

If Yes to Married, Spouse’s Social Security Number: Well now that everyone else has been left out…now why on EARTH would you EVER need their Social Security Number?

Allergic to Anything?: What exactly do you mean by allergic? I hope not! Great now you have me paranoid.

Eyesight: Yes I have it but I’m pretty blind. Do you mean do I wear glasses? Yes.

Illnesses?: Must you remind me? (Sigh.)–Multiple Sclerosis, Lupus, High Blood Pressure, Asthmatic Tendencies, Hay Fever, IBS, Prone to Infection, Probably Depression–and now I’ve crawled under the chair in the corner…

Is This a Work Related Accident?: I knew it was an accident I had all these illnesses! Yes! I’ve wanted to blame my work for something! Perfect!

When Did It Happen?: Ummmm…which dates are you looking for? What are we talking about now?

Medications: Hmmmmm. Do you have a whole book I can fill out? This little box here ain’t gonna cut it. And do I include vitamins in this or not? None of you ever know if you care about these or not.

Other Doctors?: Too many to count. Again, looking for a book to fill out. I might have room to write down one doctor.

Can We Contact Your Doctors?: Meaning what? Yes aaannndddd No. How’s that? And will you really contact them?

Any New Doctors?: Chiropractor (not that you pay attention to that because they are NOT in Western Medicine…OH but he’s a doctor too? OK…). Psychologist/Psychiatrist: Yes she’s both.

Symptoms?: Ok great. Thanks for reminding me. Yep. (Tense up).–Fatigue, pain, stiffness, weakness, tingling, heat fatigue, eye light/dark sensitivity (new–and I’m annoyed), dry eyes, dry mouth, cognitive symptoms, emotional symptoms, overall malaise, hair loss, nausea, bloating (hmmm there’s not enough room on here. In fact, there’s not enough room in any of these boxes on here. What the heck? Do you really have any patients who can fit their life/health histories in such a small space?)

WHAT KIND OF A FORM IS THIS?

*THESE ARE JUST EXAMPLES OF WHAT I’VE BEEN ASKED OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN!*

Seriously, doctors, nurse practitioners, physician assistants, medical assistants, nurses, office staff, lab technicians, etc.: How often do you really look at these? Are you even looking at these? And do I even want ALL OF YOU to see EVERYTHING I just answered? That is a flat out NO! And why isn’t there an overall database that all medical professionals have access to? Why do I have to KEEP filling out all the same questions? Why is each form different? Why can’t they be uniform? I’m tired. I’m tired of writing all of this down. I’m soooooo over rehashing all of this.

I AM NAHLEEN.

What does that mean? That means I’m a Person. I mean something. I’m not my penmanship (which used to be really good btw until I kept having to write these answers over and over again). I’m not just my name. I am 3D. I have Depth. I giggle a lot. I’m struggling all the time with my diseases. I’m not working and that was one of the hardest decisions to make. I’m afraid to say I’m feeling better because I don’t want you to think that I’m all better and shut off when I tell you that. And who knows who will be looking at these files/records and will assume I’m magically all better and then what? I don’t fit in a box. I don’t come in black and white. I come in many colors. Perhaps that’s why I express the purple that’s within me. Yes, my hair is purple. That doesn’t mean I’m happy. That also doesn’t mean I’m crying out for attention. Purple is a part of who I am. Purple has been a part of my soul since I was at least 10. That’s a long time. Can we get passed my purple hair? Thanks. Yes, I have a husband. We’ve been together 15 years. Married 6. Why does the part where I’m married mean more than the commitment of the relationship of 15 years? Yes, I have a weight problem. I’d think I myself would be the most aware of this at all times since I have to live with me. I have ALL MY LIFE. Sure I don’t get to exercise as much but how much do I need to do necessarily? I’ve been walking every day now for 401 days! I know it’s cool. You better think it’s cool! I stretch every day too. Cardio? I try. Coming here to all of my doctor appointment should count as cardio. I’m serious. Oh and did you ever ask me how I am? How I’m feeling? How I’m really doing with all these illnesses? You want me to come in next week too? Did you ask if I’d feel up to it? Did you take into account my life? You are not the only doctor in my life. You are not the only part of my life. You want me to try a new medication? Oh it only has THAT many side effects? Will you be able to pay for it? I’m currently low on funds. Did I mention to you that I’m going on a trip soon? That I want to do more than go to doctors? That I want to have a fulfilling life not focused constantly on medical crap? That I want to try to live my life not ALWAYS talking about my illnesses? Not being defined by these life disrupters? Did you know I have a Cleo Kitty? That I love to write. That I have a Honda Fit that I love? That I miss my family and loved ones back east like crazy? That I’d love to be a Producer of TV, feature films, short films, videos of any sort and to be that creative and not worry about how much time that would entail and how much that would wear me out? That because I’m always seeing you I get really tired and don’t have a lot of time to be social? That I love to be social? I almost forget this myself because I’m so caught up in stuff with you. Don’t get me wrong. Thank you for helping me or trying to. Thank you for helping me feel better (well at least a lot of you–I won’t talk about the others). Thank you for being proactive and part of my time.

BUT PLEASE TAKE ME INTO CONSIDERATION.

I am a person. I have a life. You take up a lot of me. I don’t see you for fun. I see you to get healthy. Perhaps we need to take a look at the best way to keep me healthy. Is it by seeing you all the time? Filling out these forms? Getting my arm constantly squeezed by the blood pressure cuff only for it to spike when I’m there? Is it by constantly talking about my weight? Is it by constantly stabbing my arm to check my blood work levels over and over again because you haven’t been in communication with my other doctors about my blood count levels that were taken just last week? OR is it by spacing out these appointments a bit more? By letting me expand and grow my life to see what I can do and not do? By taking the time to see that I am a human being who needs to breathe and to LIVE and experience the world as this newer more enhanced version of Nahleen???

I’m not the same Nahleen who was working 3 years ago and pushing to do my best no matter what cost it put on my body and my life because I didn’t know or understand anything different. I am a Nahleen who is feeling out my boundaries. Who is not willing to be horribly sick again if I can help it. Sure my body might have its own plans but I will not push it too far. But see I don’t have much chance to see how far I can push. If am pushing, it’s to see my therapist and chiropractor while I’m seeing my other doctors. And these 2 new medical professionals in my life are helping me to figure out how to be a Nahleen with purple hair who still has a chance to smell the roses and look up at the sky (3 of her favorite things were just mentioned here), wants to figure out where her place now is in the world, wants to be social and not live within a medical professional tunnel of health, wants to try new things, wants to do more than rehash her health stuff over and over and who needs to BREATHE!

So if I tell you I can’t see you next week and there is room to BREATHE without putting my entire health at stake (I understand sometimes there are exceptions), please give me that room. You have your life schedule. I have mine. Please respect that. And if I don’t have time to see you, please COMPROMISE. With all due respect, it’s not all about you. You are not my only doctor. You are not the only thing going on in my life. Let’s talk about this. And PLEASE, don’t give me less care because I didn’t put my life aside to come in and see you and pay you more money. There is a phone. There is email. There is always another way.

THANK YOU.

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The Crud of Healing

Posted on May 6, 2013 by Nahleen

I’ve been sort of MIA lately because I’ve been doing a lot of healing. And man is it hard.

It always seems to me like healing should be something soothing and soft and gentle. Sure that happens sometimes in the process of healing. Then again, there are those skinned knees that scab over again and again and no, that’s not comfy at all is it? Lately it’s been some of the hardest crud I’ve gone through. And I mean crud. Yet deep down I feel like it’s time. This is it.

As I’ve mentioned before, I’m now seeing a Chiropractor at least once a week. He wants to see me twice a week but so much crud (he uses that word and I’m starting to use it again) has been coming up that it takes me a week to heal from it. Yet, it’s all a good healing. I’m beginning to feel like I can become a whole person. I feel better even though my body gets twisted and contorted in weird ways. And/or he has me working on some emotional healing within the therapy.

Right now his new technique for me is something called NET or Neuro-Emotional Technique and it is fascinating. I can’t really explain it except that he was able to tell just by pushing down on my uplifted arm and putting his finger in the middle of my forehead that I had emotional blockage somewhere in my body and that that was playing a huge part in my physical symptoms and my messed up mind these days. It was crazy. When he didn’t put his finger in the middle of my forehead and pushed down on my arm I was able to push back up. When his finger was on my forehead and he pushed on my arm it went straight down and I had no strength to push back. He had basically disabled my arm. CRAZY AND FREAKY. Apparently it’s sooooo many emotions that are just flying all over the place and I’m not sure what to do with all of them so my body stores them for me and well, let’s think, that’s probably not good huh? So not only am I dragging up feelings and emotions but now they’re all just apparently free to come on up even when I didn’t invite them.

CRUD CRUD CRUD.

I’m also going to a Therapist now who I believe was sent to work directly with me. She loves the color purple, she’s bright and peppy, her office is close to where I live, and she’s also very compassionate and knows how to reach me in ways no one else seems to be able to–even ME! She’s revealing a part of me I didn’t know existed or just wasn’t ready to know or something. Talk about uncomfortable YET it really is helping. I feel like I’m getting detoxed of yucky poisonous feelings. She’s cracking my shell and the feelings are just flooding out.

Apparently it was time for all of this to come up. Wish I had gotten the memo from me that it was time to really work on all this stuff.

It’s kinda crazy how it happened that I found these 2 very important Specialists on my path right around the same time.

Next thing I know I’m in the Chiropractor’s office at the first appointment and I’m wondering how I got there and how is it that it all happened so fast. I mean my friend had just been raving about him and there I was. Then I end up having 2 doctors arguing (and not even knowing it) over a medication I’m on and telling me I should see a Psychiatrist to see what the actual Specialist says about it all and the next thing I know I’m in a Psychologist/Psychiatrist’s office and again, kinda wondering how I got there.

I’ll repeat, it would’ve been nice had someone informed me this was all gonna happen. Don’t get me wrong. I didn’t black out and become another person or my alter ego…at least I think I didn’t…no really. I remember asking about these 2 Specialists but I don’t remember deciding to take the action. Hmmm, could it be that I’m not taking FOREVER to think it all out as much as I used to and perhaps I’m going more with my gut? That I’m following the Path I’m supposed to be on and just doing it?

Still…WOULD’VE BEEN NICE TO GET THE MEMO.

Just sayin’.

So for now I’m going to try to take the advice of these 2 incredibly valuable Specialists who have already changed my life in less than 6 weeks and try to be patient. They both tell me that crud is going to come up, that things are going to be messy and that it’s okay that things are messy. Really. It’s okay if things aren’t all done my way.

Weird. I mean it’s all supposed to be done and planned in an orderly fashion or at least “Nahleen’s orderly fashion”. Well that’s not happening.

I’m feeling incredibly uncomfortable, exposed, vulnerable and raw and yet I’m feeling the safest I’ve ever felt…whatever that means.

Guess there’s more to find out. I get to find out about who this shiny new Nahleen is I’m becoming. My Therapist encourages the purple hair. She says it’s only the beginning. Now it’s time for more piercings and tattoos according to her…She’s convinced there’s a much more wild and open Spirit in me just desperate to come out and she’s trying to gently tell all of me that it’s okay to come out.

So for now I just keep on trudging through the crud. I feel like a clam who just lost its shell and now waits to be eaten by the predator who broke that shell. Poor clam. I feel so bad for it. Must be awful. I’m such a softie. Hey that can be my new Activist project. SAVE THE CLAMS!

Perhaps another time…Continuing on this side note, I’m so relieved I don’t like to eat clams or I may have just ruined any chance of ever eating them again.

What’s cool is I’m pretty sure I won’t be eaten and that I’m going to be OK. Crud and all.

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Heel 2nd Toe

Posted on April 3, 2013 by Nahleen

Heel 2nd Toe.  Heel 2nd Toe.  Heel 2nd Toe.

That’s what I had to chant to myself (and will need to TRY to do and REMEMBER to do from now on) and guide myself to do as I did what my Chiropractor called, “drunk walking” (because it’s easy to lose my balance when it’s so new) down the street to train my body how to walk correctly and in the right alignment.  Apparently my walking alignment is way off so I get to do what feels really hard to do.  And so AWKWARD.  A friend of mine loves using the word “Awkward” so I hope she appreciated me using it here in this post.  ANYWAY–When I’m walking I’m not supposed to be using my Big Toe to guide my walking.  I’m supposed to use my 2nd Toe next to the Big Toe and also focus on my hips to guide my leg out in front of me to land on my Heel and with the foot turned in (only what it seems like to me–it’s actually not in…it’s just not too far out and walking like a duck anymore…) and that’s my newest exercise.  Weirdest part is that when I stand “right” and look in the mirror what FEELS so wrong actually does look RIGHT.

I’M RE-LEARNING HOW TO WALK AGAIN.

WEIRD.

It’s hard to train a body to move differently after it has been doing probably the same movement for almost 36 years….

So I’m trying to be patient. He had me take a walk up and down the block doing that.  I asked him if the residents on the street where his office is ever stop in and ask him what is going on in here and why are there people doing all kinds of strange movements walking down the street.  He said NO but he’s sure they talk about it amongst themselves and try to figure it out.  “Keeps their minds going…”, he chuckles.

I bet.  So I did just what he asked me to do.  Of course there were people out and about.  Don’t mind me.  Just walking totally off balance…  It was a beautiful sunny California spring day.  The birds were chirping.  There was a lovely breeze blowing through the leaves.  Flowers have been in full bloom.  I was sure EVERYONE ever was staring at me but I’m guessing they weren’t.  And if they were, I hope they had fun watching me.  I didn’t look as wobbly after awhile but I was walking really slowly almost in a walking meditation and really focusing on what I was doing.

AND YOU KNOW WHAT?

My overall body felt much better walking the “correct” way.  I was surprised.  As much as my hips started aching (who knew hips were used so much with walking?), certain muscles in my legs that I didn’t know existed started yelling at me, I kept going.  I’d let myself stop, take a break and shake it all out but I’d start up again.  It really did slow me down and it was quite relaxing at times…Definitely could be a meditation if it wasn’t so distracting at too.  Sometimes I’d be distracted too and find that I was back to my old walking so I’d start up again.  Going that slow I was able to see the colorful vibrant flowers I walked by, to see more birds flying around me because I wasn’t moving so fast, a butterfly and to REALLY HEAR the breeze. That was a gift.  I’ll take it.

I’m trying to remember this so that when I wake up tomorrow morning and wonder why on earth my legs and hips are aching so badly I’ll be reminded of the “new” walking I had been doing and will have to try to do from now on and then hopefully I’ll be reminded of how peaceful it was at times.  There were some truly quiet moments…

PRECIOUS ACTUALLY…

Otherwise, he stretched my body in ways I didn’t know it could stretch today and he also gave me even more homework to FIGURE OUT what the MAGIC word was to get my hips to RELEASE and LET GO.  He said the word RELEASE doesn’t work for my hips.  He’s even tried others (I had no idea he was doing this I was so focused on what was going on) and they didn’t work either.  Soooo, he’s asked for help in figuring out what the MAGIC WORD is for helping my hips and torso to RELEASE.

MAGIC WORD.

Silly guy.  Felt like I was back to being 6 and an adult asking me, “What’s the Magic Word?”.  The thought crossed my mind that perhaps he should say, “Pretty Please?” and then maybe my mind and my body would finally RELEASE and LET GO…

So yeah.  Good appointment.  Doing OK so far.  Feeling a bit of the walk and a bit more lightheaded as the day goes on.  So I should probably stop writing, finish up my day and get to resting.  Never know what mental and physical symptoms are going to show themselves with these treatments…

Oh and by the way, I get to stay up as long as I want if I keep getting the late night energy that tells me I don’t need to sleep.

SLEEP?  WHO CARES ABOUT SLEEP?

Me in the mornings…

BUT–That’s what my body keeps asking me late at night.  I’m becoming quite the night owl.  I’ve been concerned about this because I need my sleep but when I told him today he was excited that I was starting to get ENERGY BACK.

“Yay!”, he exclaimed as I told him.  “Take advantage of it.  Don’t suppress it.  This is actual ENERGY.  Take the time to do some sit-ups (Ha!), some push-ups (Ha!), some walking around your apartment, some dancing…something.  Find an outlet and some activities to do when this happens.  Your body is resetting it’s cycles and rhythms.  I know you need sleep.  I’m sleep’s biggest advocate.  BUT your body isn’t ready for sleep like that just yet.  At least not at night.  It’s just learning how to be again.  LET IT!  DON’T WORRY.  DON’T PUNISH YOURSELF FOR NOT SLEEPING.  USE IT!  I bet you’re not sleeping well when you have this energy right?”

I told him no.  Definitely not sleeping well.

He responded with an encouragement to use the energy so that I could sleep better and it would be able to even out eventually.

His whole point was that this is like a “RE-START BUTTON”.

My body is RE-STARTING…

RE-STARTING…

Hmm.  Cool.

I’ve been saying off and on over the years that I needed a Jump Start at times.  I guess this is my chance.

And now back to the chanting…

HEEL 2ND TOE.  HEEL 2ND TOE.  HEEL 2ND TOE.

 

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Telling the Truth is Really Hard

Posted on March 27, 2013 by Nahleen

TRUTH: The past 24 hours have SUCKED mostly physically but mentally too!  There I said it!

I TOLD THE TRUTH!

DETOX IS HARD!

ANOTHER TRUTH!

Being on an emotional roller coaster yesterday for HOURS was REALLY HARD!

MORE TRUTH!

Feeling A LOT OF PAIN, FATIGUE WITH HEAVY LIMBS, SHAKINESS, LIGHT-HEADEDNESS, WEAKNESS, TINGLING, WAKING UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT WITH A HORRIBLE KNIFING PAIN ON MY RIGHT SIDE (making me freak out it’s my appendix or something crazy) AND HAVING TO RUSH TO THE BATHROOM (TMI–just getting you ready) ONLY TO HAVE MY BELLY MAKE THE LOUDEST RUMBLING NOISES AND THEN ACTUALLY HAVING THAT TRIP TO THE BATHROOM BE PRODUCTIVE (used to not be in the middle of the night and I would suffer for hours so that’s something) AND THEN HAVE THAT PAIN GO AWAY BUT FEEL THE DIGESTIVE AFTERMATH IS REALLY HARD!  BUT–THANK GOODNESS THAT KNIFING PAIN WENT AWAY AND HAS NOT COME BACK.

YES I’M YELLING!

PHEW!

It feels so good to get it out.

I have only had 2 Chiropractic treatments in the past week, BUT I have also added an Alkaline Water Detox prescribed by this Chriropractic Doctor added to my treatment so it has been extra potent.  I CLEARLY have a ton of acid in my body.

IT HAS BEEN 1 WEEK AND MY BUTT FEELS KICKED FROM 2 CHIROPRACTIC TREATMENTS?!

OY!

You know, I have heard over the years from all kinds of people on social media and elsewhere talk about all the “GOOD” effects of Detox of the body.  NOT ONE OF THEM THAT I’VE NOTICED HAS EVER TALKED ABOUT ANYTHING NEGATIVE.  Did they ever feel anything crappy going on in their bodies or was it just absolutely divine and magical with birds chirping with light breezes as they frolicked over the rolling green hills singing songs from the “Sound of Music”?  That’s what it’s always felt like to me.  So I have no idea if these people have EVER felt crappy.

Is it because they don’t want to tell the truth because Gawd forbid they look weak?  Is it because they really are feeling JUST PEACHY (although if you ask me I’d never say I was Peachy because I CAN’T STAND PEACHES so it would be the opposite for me if I said I was PEACHY.  In fact let’s all make that note now.  PEACHY for me is CRAPPY.  OK then.  Now that we’re all clear.  Back to my ranting…) KEEN?  Did I even spell that word right?  The point is, AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO HAS FELT CRAPPY FROM DETOX?  AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO IS NOW TELLING THE TRUTH?

MORE ON MY TRUTH:  Okay.  So for the past 24 hours I have wondered what wall I hit this time.  In some ways I haven’t felt like this in a long time.  Felt like someone kicked my butt and the rest of my body really hard.  What’s interesting is that the first 24 hours after treatment were actually QUITE GOOD.  I think I was on a mental high and my body was TRYING to follow along.  I felt so much mental clarity and relief and life almost felt like it was ALL good no matter what.  I almost wanted to skip down the street singing “La la la” but my legs weren’t QUITE up to it.  Oh and just to be clear, I didn’t feel up to frolicking through the rolling green hills singing songs from the Sound of Music.  I wasn’t THAT good.  That’s good right?

Anyway, I did so much in that 24 hours because I thought, WOW, I can do this.  This Chiropractic treatment stuff rocks.  It was ONLY the 1st Treatment that would be really hard at first.  Perhaps I’ll be feeling this later but not now.  LIFE IS GOOD.  I got home, made some medical business calls, wrote a Blog post, did stuff and things and I DID let myself REST a bit BUT THEN off I was running out to get groceries that evening while my mental hyperactivity was still on overload (I think now that I look back).  I mean, we NEEDED groceries and my head told me it was RIGHT then no matter what.  So I left at 6:30pm and by 7:30pm as I was almost done my ARMS started telling me they were really tired and didn’t want to work much more and then they were in pain.  Then by 8pm my BODY was done.  By 9pm my MIND was done.  And yet there was still some clarity so I stayed up way too late.  I CONFESS.  I didn’t LISTEN enough to my body at that point.

Got up for a dang Fasting Appointment the next morning to have blood work done with a doctor I have VERY mixed feelings about and thought all was going to be OK.  I was still OK.  Sure I was tired but Fasting Appointments are really hard for me.  My body with its MS, lupus, IBS and you NAME IT needs its routine.  No food means no medications.  No medications means my body is already unhappy.  No food yet already being active when on a normal day it usually takes me over 4 hours to really feel like I can go on with my day as a human being is not a good thing for me.  At least let me have some food.  PLEASE.  If my body lets me that is…

ANYWAY, after the appointment, I ate and I felt a bit more invigorated YET to be honest my body was starting to protest more.  And then I ran around doing too many errands at once when I should’ve just gone back home to at least get some more rest before doing them made my body VERY UNHAPPY before 12pm.  The appointment had been at 8:30am.

BY 12PM I had HIT A WALL.

ALL DONE.  Had to push to do the basics.  The emotional roller coaster (was told this would happen even more and be magnified according to my Chiropractor as the emotions are cleared out and released from my body and it was ALL part of the healing process) started for the next 5 hours at least, my body had a hard time letting me do the basics like get up and move around.  It was shaky and weak and in pain.  SOOOO DONE WITH ME.

So I rested.  AND RESTED SOME MORE.  Resting helps.

RESTING HELPS.

Phew.  Sometimes resting doesn’t ALWAYS help the way I want it to.  My body has been recovering ever since.  I’d get waves of physical symptoms into the night last night and then there was that time in the middle of the night of complete and utter pain and discomfort and I’ve been working through that ever since.

SO GLAD I CAN WRITE THIS.

Yesterday I wouldn’t have been able to write this in any way.  ALL OF ME WAS DONE.

DONE.

But this Blog post has been bubbling up to the surface ever since I FINALLY was able to really get up out of bed today.  EXTRA SLEEP HELPED TOO.  I HAD TO WRITE THIS TODAY.  I HAD TO EXPRESS MYSELF.  I know it is all part of the healing.  I call it EMOTIONAL HAIRBALLS.

Meanwhile at the same time, as I think about how my body is overall, I know it’s not a regular lupus/multiple sclerosis flare.  I know my body is flaring up because all kinds of healing trauma (WHAT?  HEALING TRAUMA?  Parts of me want to object to what I just wrote and argue with me.) because it feels cleansing.  It feels like all kinds of toxin crapola is being FORCED out.  My mind is clearer.  My body is clearer.  So strange to say that and feel it and NOT REALLY BE ABLE TO DESCRIBE IT.

So the FEAR comes up.  Is this Treatment too much for me?  How will I do this?  I DON’T WANT TO MAKE MY BODY WORSE.  I CAN’T MAKE MY BODY WORSE.  I DEAL WITH ENOUGH.  IT’S HARD ENOUGH.  But then the nurturing side of me comes in and gently reminds me that I am feeling better at the same time.  I’m going to NEED TO BE VERY UPFRONT with the Chiropractor tomorrow at my next treatment and tell him EVERYTHING that has gone on in the past 24 hours BEFORE he jumps right in and manipulates my body into its relieving craziness of the next treatment.  He had told me it would be hard especially at first and to try to trust and be honest with him and myself in all ways at all times about how I’m doing.  That we would adjust treatments accordingly.  He also told me I’d have to rest more.

That’s hard to do.  I’m TRYING to have a life and I have SO MUCH going on right now.  FINDING BALANCE is a whole other issue I’m dealing with.

WHERE DOES IT ALL FIT IN?

Well what I have to remind myself is that it all fits in the way it is supposed to fit in.  It will all work out and it will happen or not happen BUT the world still turns.  It doesn’t explode because “MY PLANS” didn’t work out the way I liked.

DO THEY EVER?

SO WHY DO I KEEP TRYING TO FORCE MY PLANS OVER MY LIFE?  It doesn’t work that way.

So for now I’ll go back to resting and doing THE BEST I CAN WITH WHAT I HAVE.  It feels really good to have communicated this today.  Thank you ALL for reading.  It means so much to be able to get it out and STOP HOLDING ONTO IT.  Something tells me this may not have come out if it wasn’t for this detox and new treatment journey I’m starting.

I feel much better and calmer right now and I will enjoy it while I can.

Take care all and please if you can, be gentle with yourself and your body.  Healing can be really hard but what I’m discovering is that I’m worth it and so are you.

 

 

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A CLEAN MOUTH OF HEALTH!

Posted on February 5, 2013 by Nahleen

OMG!  No WAY!

This is the second time in a row that I have gone to the Dentist and been told that my mouth is doing really well!  HOW COOL IS THAT?!

See with LUPUS and lupus medications, I have had a tendency to have dry mouth syndrome (I know there’s a name for it), swollen gums, bleeding gums, sensitive teeth, a sensitive or swollen tongue (TMI I know), cankers and just a whole bunch of IRRITATION!

Well lately I’ve been thinking about my Dentist appointment coming up and have realized that I have not been thinking about my mouth lately.  Now isn’t that a weird sentence for ya!  Funny how that is.  I have been thinking about issues and symptoms in my mouth for years…EVEN BEFORE THE LUPUS DIAGNOSIS IN AUGUST 2010.

SO YEAH.

All is CLEAN AND WELL IN NAHLEEN’S MOUTH!

That may have been more than you needed to know but I’m happy to share it because right now, any good physical health is a huge VICTORY for me these days!

The ONLY REMINDER I got from my Dentist is to be really careful and pay extra attention to my Wisdom teeth (yes I still have ALL 4 OF THEM!  If only I was more WISE from them…) because that’s where all the problems can really start since they’re so hard to get to.  I get that reminder every time so it wasn’t a big concern.

SO HOW COOL IS THAT?!

I NEED MORE APPOINTMENTS LIKE THAT!

I was so up from that good news and appointment that I found myself eating lunch at the Veggie Grill using a gift card given to me by an awesome friend, and having my favorite B-Wing Salad (if you haven’t tried you have got to!), then driving to Santa Monica beach so I could pick up some purple hair dye and stock up at a new store (of which I LOVE and had no idea about–thank you SIRI on my IPhone–you may be creepy but you helped a lot today), ended up purchasing some special muscle soak bath salts that are all natural and stopped by a Jamba Juice to try to get some extra nutritional needs taken care of since I’m going on a special diet prep for a special Hydrogen Breathing Test on Thursday.  Needless to say Wednesday will be weird, hence the dying the hair purple to pep me up for Thursday’s “UN-FUNNESS” of no eating and no meds till after the test that may take over 3 hours (YIPPY SKIPPY), and nurturing the body because lupus and MS can get very irritated from being so OUT OF ROUTINE and depleted of all things to take care of it.

I also found myself driving along the coast and parking very easily at a spot along the street with my Handicapped Placard (best part about having one is parking and not having to pay for meters or worry about time constraints unless they’re Street Sweeping–learned that the hard way years ago) and walking down the stairway (COULD NOT HAVE PLANNED THAT BETTER), only to find myself walking out onto a WALKWAY halfway onto the beach and then straight towards the ocean.  It was a cloudy cool day so hardly anyone was there…THAT IS EXCEPT 2 DIFFERENT PHOTO SHOOTS (one of them may have been a music video–so WISH I knew who those 2 different women in different locations were with their whole entourages) and lots of birds taking advantage of the absence of weird human creatures.

Once that was done I dragged my satisfied self (getting tired by then but so happy to be taking care of myself and things just so wonderfully falling into place) to the grocery store to get some regular groceries and other items to help me get through the strange diet menu I need to have tomorrow to Prep for that Thursday test.

SO ALL IN ALL.  A pretty good day even if I do say so myself and I DO!

Was also nice to see that our Cleo Kitty was doing better since this morning because this morning she got sick I think from eating her food too fast and that always worries us with her health issues.  She seems to still be recovering but is much better I think.  Was probably good for me to get away and leave her alone so she could get some REAL rest but BOY was she HAPPY TO SEE ME AND I TO SEE HER.

I LOVE MY CLEO KITTY!

OK.  Time to unwind…

It’s nice when days fall into place.  They rarely do that with such ease and I’m going to take the time to enjoy that…

AND BREATHE…

RIGHT NOW.  DID YOU BREATHE WITH ME?  YOU SHOULD TRY IT.  MAKES A BIG DIFFERENCE.

That’s even better.

Hope you all have had a good day too!  We all deserve more of those!  Write to you soon!

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2nd Opinion Gastroenterologist Turns Into THE Gastroenterologist!

Posted on December 13, 2012 by Nahleen

So today I have an appointment with a doctor who used to be my 2nd Opinion Gastroenterologist.  I call him THE Gastroenterologist now because he really has become the doctor to help me the most on my health journey right now when it comes to digestive issues and apparently I REALLY HAVE THEM!

He helped me figure out that I was dealing with Irritable Bowel Syndrome (and probably had been all my life without being aware of it) in November and his treatment and CALMING DEMEANOR have really helped me.  The 1st Gastro doctor was very helpful for me for almost 2 years but he was so stuck on me having a small intestine bacterial infection that that was all he saw.  Soooo, when my digestive system started acting up he’d throw me on antibiotics which I will admit really did help in the beginning.  BUT THEN, I’m pretty sure they were REVVING up my IBS and my intestines were screaming at me!

So glad I listened to some gentle nudges from others close to me because I don’t know where I’d be now.  I asked for a referral from a newer Gynecologist (who may just end up being my new one there too even though I LOVE my current one) and she was able to give me the name of this current Gastro specialist.

Not only did I like the office environment but I was told right away by his Medical Assistant that I was in the right place and that the doctor I was seeing was the expert with IBS and other digestive issues.  She also said I was in good hands and not to be too nervous–when she had noted how elevated my blood pressure was from being nervous in a new doctor’s office.  She said he was very calming.  And then she pointed out that I was in the right place and that the whole team of doctors in that office work together to help their patients get better.  She said if there’s a problem, they’ll figure it out.  I’d never heard a medical professional within the same office have so much faith in who they worked for…

This doctor sure is calming.  Wow.  AND he’s proactive.  He is very much about dealing with the problems of the moment and not thinking too much in the future and he’s gentle and to the point.  The treatment he first prescribed me helped me a lot.  I FELT LIKE A DIFFERENT PERSON–so much better than I had.  He told me that he was sure my MS and lupus would also feel better if we could just get my body to calm down.  Well that was true too!  He also assured me that there were a lot of various different types of treatments and so if this first one didn’t work or last that we could go a different route.

Well a few weeks ago I was hit with a sinus infection and the doctors get really scared when I get any infection because the diseases I have could flare up and I’m very apt to go from something minor to something major like pneumonia in no time so they’re hit with the dilemma of needing to give me antibiotics to kill it right away.  I wondered this would do to my IBS and my IBS treatment.  Well, let’s just say I haven’t been able to get it back to the “better” it was at since then.  It does still seem to be working but I’m flared up a bit again and according to this doctor, it just means it’s not the right treatment for me or balance just yet.

Soooo, we’ll see how it goes.  As much as I’m so tired of going to the doctor, I’m also really tired of having a part of me that feels really crappy.  So it doesn’t bother me too much to go to this doctor and see what we can do about my situation.  It’s nice to have a doctor who wants to try new things at least to get it right and be proactive and NOT have one who was really telling me to JUST DEAL and keep staying on the antibiotics for the supposed small intestine bacterial infection (I’m convinced I did have one at some point but NOT then) for as long as needed.  I also look forward to his calming influence.  I need that a lot these days.

Yet again I learned to listen to my body.  My body tells me when something’s not right.  I know my body better than anyone.  I need to speak up for it when I can.  I also need to take care of it too which means less stress.  I’m working on that but it’s hard with some of the financial and healthcare insecurities I’m dealing with these days but that’s a whole other Blog post or posts for that matter.

It’s nice to get back into this.  I’ve missed it.  Thank you all for joining me and for reading.

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Operation Nahleen New ‘Do!

Posted on December 12, 2012 by Nahleen

OK.  So here I am.  I’ll spare you the scary in-between pics (weird foil and other strange things they do to your hair when coloring it and stuff) and show you the results instead.

I decided to go to a totally different hair stylist this time to see what would happen.  Devachan is the name of the place and they specialize in curly hair.  I really had a great experience there the whole way through.  I was pampered as soon as I walked in the door.

I had scheduled a hair appointment just to cut my hair and a hair color consultation (the hair coloring would come another time).  So what I didn’t mention earlier is that I had a VERY different hair style before this final hair style.  I LOVED IT BUT it wasn’t me.  My awesome hair stylist told me that if any adjustments were needed on my hair she’d do them at the coloring appointment.  So I really thought about how my hair was during the 4 days between appointments and came to the conclusion that it was really NOT going to work out.  I was looking for something fun, more out of my face (find that more and more I can’t stand it too much in my face–think it’s sensory thing with health stuff), off my neck (heat reasons due to MS and well probably the lupus too), could handle wearing a hat more (lupus–need to wear one almost all the time if there’s any UV rays or I can FEEL them), handle the curls, a little funky too AND OF COURSE IT HAD TO HAVE PURPLE!  Sooooo, at the coloring appointment I had a heart to heart with my stylist and she took care of it and together we came up with this.  I got to have 2 different hair styles and pamperings in 5 days!  I call it the ME DO.  She’s a Junior Stylist who is working her way up to Senior Stylist and I think she was pretty nervous because she was trying something very new and NOT what she had recommended at first.

However, AT THE FINALE, the Senior Stylist who was there was blown away by the outcome and exclaimed how SUPER CUTE it was!  That it was TOTALLY me and that I was a true artist by telling her what I needed.  So it worked out great because my Junior Stylist got a lot of praise and was also happy with how it came out.  I think we both learned a lot from each other.  She was very funny, sweet and honest.  Meant for me I think.  Turns out the Senior Stylist wanted pictures right away from his phone so that he could include them in their own Hair Style Manual for examples.  Well then.  That’s a pretty neat compliment if you ask me.

And without further ado:

INTRODUCING THE NEWER MORE IMPROVED NAHLEEN ‘DO!:

Here’s the Final! Doesn’t really show how good it looked but it shows the purple!

Side view! Needed the cut to be short to be off my neck for health and heat reasons mostly. I love it that short!

The FINAL of the back although I shouldn’t say that because my hair stylist kept fixing it even as I was walking out the door…

And when I got home I kept playing with it so we could see it from all angles. It’s purple, it’s practical, it’s cute and it’s ME! I LOVE IT!

And another angle because I was having fun!

And I just had to show the top!

And I post this one because I feel like it shows my spunkier side. I’m thrilled with this style FOR ME!

AND A WEEK AND A HALF LATER I STILL LOVE IT!  WOO HOO!

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ACUPUNCTURE TODAY!

Posted on August 28, 2012 by Nahleen

I have a one track mind today. It’s called ACUPUNCTURE AT 3PM TODAY!!!!!

My body has had more than enough of this sun and heat and so have I! Yes, it’s summer and Blah Blah Blah but for goodness sakes, I need some relief!

Sure, air conditioning is fabulous and closed blinds help but there’s only so much a cool dark cave can do. When it’s hot it’s HOT. My body knows it. I can’t fool it. I tend to hold in the heat and stock up on it just in case I end up freezing one day (hmm, it’s been YEARS since that’s happened) and I am rarely ever cold. I also am a sponge to humidity and suck in the dampness and then I’m really in trouble. Heat and dampness don’t mix well in a multiple scleroris/lupus world. Nope. No they don’t.

Heck, MS and lupus don’t mix together either but that’s a whole other topic.

I’m grateful to have found acupuncture years ago and been willing to try it. It’s not a cure but it sure has reduced my body temperature a great deal. I still remember my first appointment and treatment with this wonderful lady. She told me I carried too much heat and dampness and she was going to cool me down and dry me out. I HAD NO IDEA the effect it would really have on me. While I laid on that table in that strange room with all these weird needles in me (DON’T LOOK) with a lovely eye pillow on my eyes and relaxing music playing in the background, I started feeling what felt like a door/window open in my right arm and it was like this rush of cool air started working its way in up my arm, across my shoulders and into my left arm and kept going throughout my body. I was convinced it was someone turning on the AC or was blowing a fan on me. Nope. It was the effect of acupuncture and because I was so seriously boiling hot internally the relief was almost overwhelming! When I told my Acupuncturist about my physical sensations, she was thrilled. It was exactly what she was hoping for and yet she was baffled. She said I must be really sensitive because most people aren’t so aware of how they’re feeling during their treatment and will tell her later instead of right then. (I continue to be that sensitive years later and she says she LOVES to treat me because she gets more of an idea of what works and what doesn’t with me.)

After a few more treatments I was committed to keep on going with these acupuncture treatments. In fact, the relief of the intensity of symptoms (my body was throbbing with symptoms at that point) had me on a big HIGH a few weeks later because it was like the endorphins knew how to function again and the ABSOLUTE PLEASANTNESS I felt was unbelievable. I was bouncy and unbelievably light and happy. Everything was GREAT! Now realistically that didn’t last but it was a nice feeling to have at the time. I had NO IDEA I COULD FEEL BETTER…

I soon found acupressure treatments at the same office and swear by those too. It is acupressure that has loosened up my body the most and helped me to function with daily activities and in the world.

Sooooo needless to say, I CAN’T WAIT FOR MY ACUPUNCTURE APPOINTMENT TODAY AT 3PM! IT CAN’T COME SOON ENOUGH!

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