Posts Tagged With: kitty

CAMBRIA HERE WE COME!

Posted on March 8, 2013 by Nahleen

YIPPEEEE!!!!

Heading to Cambria today at some point when we can pull ourselves together! We have reservations at a spa/hotel/resort in a room that has a king size bed, jacuzzi style tub with spa jets, a fireplace, a pillow top bed, a spa to get massages and facials, supposed live entertainment on Saturday nights, a luxury continental breakfast in the mornings, a walkway that connects to a boardwalk that leads through a State Park straight to the ocean and the list goes on and on! I can’t wait!

Yesterday was the kind of day that went really well in the beginning and it all flowed really well and then about halfway through after making a business call it sank and it sank fast. I don’t want to get into it but this trip has come at the PERFECT TIME!

Not only is Cleo Kitty doing quite well (and we have a lovely lady coming to watch and stay with her who has bonded with her in the past which I tell you is a VERY RARE THING if you’re not Corey or myself), I am feeling much much better from taking care of myself and going to the doctor and taking antibiotics that IMMEDIATELY kicked that infection’s buttinsky and from the storms happening last night that ACTUALLY INCLUDED ONE HUGE BRIGHT FLASH OF LIGHTNING AND THEN A HUGE CRAZY CRACK OF THUNDER RIGHT OVERHEAD (which is VERY RARE AND EXCITING IN LA) so that helped me get some physical relief, I’m actually feeling up to taking a road trip (WHOA! LOOK AT ME GO!–haven’t been able to plan a road trip or trust that I could do one longer than 2 hours and that was pushing it…for AGES it feels like), I’m going with Corey and I can’t remember the last time we got away just the 2 of us to a place that wasn’t connected to anyone we knew (don’t get me wrong I love my peeps but we need some REAL TIME AWAY), and well IT IS JUST TIME.

So off we go at some point today. Part of this whole trip is the road trip. We will get there when we get there. I used to love road trips with Corey. We have the best time if we just go with it. I keep thinking we should be hurrying up and leaving now but then that’s not either of our styles to be honest and that would kick my already emotionally fragile lupus and MS butt that has made my physicality a bit fragile too today. So when it’s meant to be that we go, we go.

To be honest, after that phone call yesterday regarding YET ANOTHER BIG LIFE DECISION (HAVEN’T I MADE ENOUGH OF THOSE LATELY!? A GAL NEEDS A BREAK HERE AND THERE!), if I wasn’t already getting away and planning on running away anyway to try to relax and clear my head, I would’ve run away anyway. I have mentally had ENOUGH!

So enough of this writing chatter. Gotta get back to my self care so we can get the heck outta here.

THE ONLY DOWNSIDE?

… (sad face here) Leaving Cleo Kitty. I haven’t left her since the whole “cancer” episode (I say that because she is so resilient and awesome that she doesn’t seem to have cancer (really long story–but she does have some other serious health problems and sensitivities. Never did get a definitive diagnosis because she’s a kitty and didn’t need to be more traumatized than she already was for goodness sakes) and that was in December 2011. We are quite attached to each other and have been each other’s caretakers since then. So as much as I know it is for the best, it will still be hard. But we will be back Sunday night. And I have to remember that the fact that we can even leave her at this point is amazing. In November we had planned a similar trip to celebrate 15 years together and 6 years of marriage and had to cancel it because her health was so questionable and we couldn’t leave her. Now I look at her and it’s hard to believe that happened. She’s so in the mood to keep living and we finally got to the bottom of her health stuff too so that’s good.

Anyway, I keep babble-writing. Off I go!

Write soon!

Oh and to my new followers HI! Yay! Thanks for joining me on my crazy path. To my commenters–yay thank you for commenting! I plan on responding next week.

Have a great weekend y’all! I know I am not the only one going through this thing we call life and holy moly it can be hard and intense…

Love to all!

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AND…I’M BACK!!!!

Posted on December 11, 2012 by Nahleen

Yes I’m here!

Dang DSL is back up and running and apparently so am I!

There’s a lot of life going on here.  There’s the holidays, doctor appointments, taking care of me (full time job), more disability issues that seem never ending and insecurity there because one entity terminated my coverage which then cut off my healthcare coverage, but then I happened to go on Medicare (having pride issues about going on that at age 35 but at the same time so GRATEFUL to have the coverage) LITERALLY the next day after being cut off, yet at the same time there’s a whole Prescription Part D of the Medicare coverage that I had not enrolled in because I was told by my healthcare people not to worry about that since they would cover the Prescription part of my healthcare, but then that couldn’t happen because they had to cut me off due to the disability entity being connected to my work and they gave me no time to sign up for that part which I believe is illegal, so now I’m trying to find the time, energy and patience to sign up for a Prescription Plan and have to pay out of pocket for my medications until I do so and I HAVE NO IDEA HOW I’M GOING TO GET MY GILENYA MEDICATION FOR MS BECAUSE IT’S SO EXPENSIVE (that’s tomorrow’s priority call), I’m also trying to appeal all of this but before I do that I need to be able to even get through reading the horrible termination letter from this disability entity that is so upsetting for so many reasons, so I’ve been dealing with feelings and emotions, picking myself back up, getting a new hairdo that I plan on showing pictures of very soon, dealing with an undiagnosis of cancer for our dearest Cleo Kitty yet she still has a very sensitive immune system and we are trying to balance all those issues, along with my newly diagnosed IBS acting up because the treatment just isn’t cutting it, along with having multiple sclerosis and lupus, having a really neato husband who’s always there and supportive and trying to spend time with him while he’s making changes, trying to have a social life, doing my best to stay sane, be in touch with lots of people, trying to rest and recover and it goes on and on.

I made that a MEGA RUN-ON sentence because I think it helps to see just how OVERWHELMED I am and how big my life is.  Sure there are a lot of really great things going on but they are intense and I truly believe I’ve been on a spiritual journey for quite awhile that is really helping but a lot of work.  HOWEVER, there are some really seriously scary things going on with this current healthcare insecurity and financial insecurity and a lot of feelings of anger yet at the same time it’s the IBS that’s acting up and my MS and lupus have calmed down.  BUT I have to be careful of that because that could change at any time especially if I don’t do all the self-care I need to do and get enough rest.  And hence things get done when they get done and that’s how it is.  As a person who is a Type A personality at the core and has had to really unwind that over the years, it still hits me every time and I struggle with it trying to get myself to just calm down.

It’s hard to PRIORITIZE right now but I’m taking it moment by moment and breath by breath.  Day by day is the best I can do.  By the way, did you know that BREATHING and taking extra BREATHS helps???  I mean who knew?  I’m really finding out that I hold my breath way too much so I’m trying to work on that.

WOW!  I’m tired just from writing this.  My Cleo Kitty is calling me.  She beckons quite often these days.  Gotta love her.  She is quite a spirit.

I hope you are all well and that I can write more soon.  Take care and I hope you can remember to breathe during this time of the year too.  Turns out it’s quite important to do…

 

 

 

 

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Short and Sweet

Posted on November 29, 2012 by Nahleen

Hi there. WHAT A WEEK!

We have had Internet issues all week so I’m typing this from my phone. I will elaborate later but here’s the gist:

1. Sinus infection: got really close to worse and almost started up my asthma so I was close to needing an inhaler again…more antibiotics but I think they’re helping.

2. It’s raining which means my lupus and MS are acting up.

3. Found out the hard way yesterday that the Private Long Term Disability company I’ve been with for 2 years has dropped my coverage. Very upsetting. Yes I will Appeal. HATE that I have to. This could also affect my healthcare coverage because it was all connected through my work.

4. Figured out I start Medicare health coverage this Saturday…not in 2 weeks so at least I’m covered there. However, the Prescription coverage is sticky right now. Still have lots more phone calls to make…NOT a happy camper about that.

5. And we have KITTY MIRACLE news! It’s a long year of a story but it is most likely that our dearest Cleo Kitty DOESN’T have cancer and has been dealing with a very sensitive immune system that has so many other issues. And right now she seems to be feeling better than she has in a long while which is even AWESOMER! Another story to elaborate on there too. I think Corey and I are still in shock about that. We found out last night!

And that’s enough for now. Hard to write anything on a phone but still so cool that it’s even possible…

Hope everyone is well and I will write more and respond to Comments when I can.

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Nahleen’s THANKITUDES!

Posted on November 21, 2012 by Nahleen

THANKITUDES you ask?

Are you thankful and grateful?  Are you having a hard time choosing between one?  Do they come with “att-itudes” sometimes too?

SURE!

Let’s take a look at Nahleen’s Book of Nahleenism’s and oh look at that!  She’s just added a new word to her language: THANKITUDEFUL.  Definition: Feeling thankful, grateful, adding the attitude where necessary (or not–your choice).  Also can be written as THANKITUDES…

Quite often these days I find myself feeling thankful, grateful and full of attitude.  Sometimes I find myself feeling just one of those.  Is there a difference between thankful and grateful?  Hard to know really.  I think it depends on the day, who I am that day (I change a lot during the day don’t you?), what’s happening, how I’m feeling and whatever else affects my feelings.

So in light of the upcoming US Thanksgiving Holiday tomorrow, Thursday November 22, 2012, I wanted to share my festive version.

NAHLEEN’S THANKITUDES  (I spent too long trying to figure out if this was a one time only thing or if this could continue and well who cares right now?–I soon found myself not thankful or grateful and FULL OF ATTITUDE because of my own silliness soooo…)–without further ado:

 

AHEM…Let’s try again….no need to make it bold.  Perhaps I put too much pressure on myself…

 

NAHLEEN’S THANKITUDES:

1. I’m THANKITUDEFUL for ME.  Truly amazing to be feeling this way about myself.  This is a work in progress.  Quite often I wonder why I had to be born with such a messed up immune system and why my body had to be so sensitive…why it had to be full of what I conceive as inconveniences and the like.  I can’t stand that I have multiple sclerosis, lupus, probable IBS, food sensitivities like crazy, environmental sensitivities, sometimes asthma and I’m sure the list goes on and on.  And then there’s my crazy mind that beats me up, goes wacky like The Looney Tunes Tasmanian Devil, is meaner to me than anyone else would be and sometimes abuses me.  Then again, I am so much more compassionate towards myself and realize that self care is a wonderful thing.  It helps me to stop, look, listen, pay attention.  These illnesses help me connect more and more with people, with nature and its amazing beauty, meditate and quiet my head, stay more in the moment, and learn who I really am and how to love me for me.  Honestly, I am finally LEARNING HOW TO LIVE MY LIFE.  It sucks that I had to/and still have to go through all of this to get there but I finally am understanding that it’s THANKITUDEFUL that I am for ME.  I’m all I have.  I don’t get to run away and no one else seems to run away from me so there must be some good qualities somewhere.

2. I’m THANKITUDEFUL for my husband, companion, best friend, partner in crime, silly, giggle-making, talented, supportive, compassionate and BIG TIME BRATTY PANTS, Corey Blake.  If you don’t know this guy, you’re missing out.  Standing almost 6 feet tall you’d think that if you’re short like me, you’d have to look up to him and would NEVER be on his level.  This is so not true.  This guy talks to all he encounters as if he is equal with them.  He has the most compassionate heart I know and he is obsessed (in a good way or at least I like to think that I tame that back as if I control him-ha!) with KITTIES!  If he had his way, he’d fill his life with so many kitties he wouldn’t be able to find himself.  He wants to be a kitty for goodness sakes.  As you can guess, our Cleo Kitty is in very good hands.  He is also incredibly funny and talented on the stage and if you haven’t seen him do his thang on the stage or in front of the camera than you are truly missing out on a miracle in action.  He absolutely lights up the stage.  He is my inspiration for getting out there and just doing it.  I myself can’t believe he would stay with me with all that goes on with me with my health but he has been there from THE BEGINNING.  We had only been dating for 2 weeks and my best friend kitty (my sister growing up) passed away and he was there while I grieved.  Only 3 months later my dearest bestest Nana in the entire world who I adored more than I can even describe passed away AND he was there…the ENTIRE WEEK AFTER.  We traveled across the country together to pursue our dreams in Los Angeles, CA from New Hampshire and Massachusetts.  We built our lives here and have just celebrated not only 15 years together as a couple, but 6 years married, 12 years with our dearest Cleo Kitty daughter and 13 years here in LA!  He was with me when I was diagnosed with MS almost exactly 10 years ago.  He was with me when I was diagnosed with lupus over 2 years ago.  And he stays.  He also proposed to me on Waikiki Beach at night at the edge of the ocean, with the moon glowing and the stars twinkling (just to give you an example)—so romantic.  We had the funnest wedding ever and kept it the way we wanted it with our own silly flare.  Thank goodness we laugh and keep it light.  Our conversations travel on the path of silliness, to snippy snappy (our version of fighting), to serious, to meaningful, to heartfelt, to honest, to feelings, back to me giggling so hard by something he said that I’m crying and can’t breathe.  Can you tell I love the guy?  Sure he drives me crazy (uh oh, he’s reading this and might be upset with me for saying this or worried) but that’s because we are the closest to each other and we need someone to drive us crazy.  Apparently none of us are perfect.  And I’m oh so sure I NEVER drive him crazy.  Nope.  Through our ups and downs and such great and amazing times, it is us.  We are a team and I am so THANKITUDEFUL for that.

3. I’m THANKITUDEFUL for my daughter kitty, my Cleo Kitty.  That little girl of mine (is not a little girl in kitty age that’s for sure) is so mature and wise.  She teaches me how to live in the moment.  How to take things as they come.  To stop and play and enjoy myself.  That life is about living in the moment.  She is my BEST KITTY FRIEND.  I adore her.  She was a stray who had clearly been domesticated at some point in her very young life when she was found and really just wanted to live inside and not have to deal with the crazy outside world anymore.  When we met her it was love at first site for both Corey and I BUT it was clearly love at first site between Corey and Cleo.  I was just the extra for a long time.  She’d put up with me in order to be with Corey.  She was smart.  She knew the deal.  Over the years we have built our own very special and connected relationship that warms my heart.  She is my best kitty friend, my health partner (she was diagnosed with cancer in December of last year–almost a year ago) and we take care of each other.  We take turns.  She really does watch over me and I try to do the same.  She understands A LOT of English and gets frustrated that we don’t understand Kitty Language but we’re definitely getting better at it.  She plays, she loves, she sleeps, she is our alarm clock, she looks for support in all areas when she’s not comfortable with something, she is our companion and we love her so.  She really has done well and we had only 2 close calls with her life in the past few months.  One was from trying a new medication but she pulled through in about 24 hours and the last was almost 2 weeks ago.  This one might have also been a medication reaction but in all fairness, she has cancer and a weaker body immune system and is very sensitive with digestive issues and with some breathing issues we’re still trying to narrow down.  I am truly THANKITUDEFUL to have her in my life still.  She’s decided she’s not done yet and we are doing our best to help her feel comfortable and happy and if anything she is still very happy.  Every moment more with her is a true blessing.

4. I’m THANKITUDEFUL for all living supporters on my path.  That includes you.  These living supporters are people (friends, family, people I connect with out in the world, Facebook people, online people, Twitter people, the people I small talk with all the time, my doctors, any people in any part of the medical world I continuously find myself in, anyone who helps me or who I can help), dogs, cats, plants, the earth and nature.  You name it.  I am serious.  Any living thing.  I believe we are all connected in some way.  That doesn’t mean we have to all love each other or even like each other.  However we are all here for each other.  We are all alive and giving feedback in some way.  And as a part of this, I LOVE PEOPLE.  I do.  PEOPLE ROCK!  Sure some of them are more likeable than others.  Some I may not even really want in my life BUT they are there for a reason.  We all have something to give.  We are all just us trying to be US.  That is it.  And yes at times we can all be jerks (yes, Nahleen’s ego–you too–I still don’t believe it), and truly unlikeable (of course Nahleen’s ego has no idea of what I’m talking about) but it’s true.  And so to get away from this silliness I just wrote, I look forward to more and more connecting.  It is what keeps me going.  I think connecting with people is one of my hobbies.  I am so THANKITUDEFUL for you all.

5. I’m THANKITUDEFUL for this Blog.  I feel like this is inconsequential since the other 4 items on this list are so personal and why would I just feel this way for a Blog?  Well, it helps me write which is something I believe I’ve been meant to do for a long time.  I just need to write.  Not sure what that means but this is my 141st Blog post so I guess that means something.  I had no idea my Blog would go this far.  I had no idea I’d have this much to write and oh so much more!  I had no idea that anyone would want to join me on my journey.  I didn’t think anyone would care (again, about my crazy mean mind sometimes as posted above).  I didn’t know that I’d even be silly and post about ’80s songs or post any pictures.  I just didn’t know.  Once I jumped in this time I was ready.  It was time.  Thank you for being there.  It is so cool for someone such as myself who has to spend so much time at home resting and taking care of myself in order to get through the day.  So much self care to do and most often this has been added to my list of things I NEED to do to survive.  Sometimes it’s taken off because I need to pace myself and just breathe.  It all really depends.  And you know what’s also so cool?  Hearing from you!  Getting comments on my posts has been one of the coolest aspects.  I just love it!  Thank you to so many of you for encouraging me along the way and even way before I could really commit to it.  You know who you are.  You rock!  I am so THANKITUDEFUL for this Blog of exploration, silliness and connection.  I can’t wait to see what the future holds for it!

 

So that’s that.  I think that’s enough for today.  I really needed to write this.  The nudge has been on me to write something like this for a few days now and maybe I can breathe a little easier knowing I got it out.

Thank you thank you thank you.

DO YOU HAVE ANY THANKITUDES you would like to share?  I’d love to read them!  I have a feeling we all would!

Take care all.  Will write soon I’m sure.

 

 

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Celebrating a Very Happy 12 Year Anniversary with our Cleo Kitty!

Posted on October 10, 2012 by Nahleen

Happy 12 Years with us, Cleo Kitty! And Happy Birthday to you too!

We celebrate Cleo’s Birthday today 10/10 too because we don’t know her real Birthday and since this day was so special for all of us, we count it as Anniversary and Birthday all in one!

I’ll always remember that day…

We had decided we were in need of a change. We had just moved to Burbank, CA from New Hampshire and Massachusetts (our home states) and had been living in a studio apartment for 10 months. We did OK but we were really struggling for our own space. Talk about feeling cramped.

So we decided we needed to move to a place that accepted kitties (we might have taken in a kitty at this place secretly but we lived directly across from the apartment manager and it would’ve been too obvious), and that it needed to be at least a 1 bedroom apartment.

SPACE AND A KITTY–that’s the answer…and it was!

Pretty soon after we made that declaration, it was as if the universe listened. Corey’s co-worker had mentioned that she had a stray kitty that she was befriending for over a year who really seemed like she wanted a home. She seemed domesticated because she kept trying to come in this person’s house as if she knew that was the place to go. This lady was so nice and would put out towels and blankets for her at night and give her food. I guess she had been coming by to visit this lady for about a year and at one point had had at least one litter of kittens that she had to parade by her so she could show them off. These two were clearly friends. She would’ve taken her in herself but she just didn’t feel comfortable with kitties. She had never had one and didn’t feel right giving her a home that wasn’t completely welcoming to kitties.

Corey caught onto this and told me about it. The problem was, we had just made this decision to move and get a kitty and were still in our non-kitty-welcoming studio apartment without a new place to go. BUT we went to visit her anyway. We just had to meet her. We heard how sweet this kitty was and how much this lady respected her.

As we got to this nice lady’s house, she told us to sit outside on her porch. That “Cleopatra” as she had named her (she would sit very regally and check people out–almost elegant) would be sure to come on by and check us out. I guess she had seen other prospective new people to own and would probably size us up too. Now where Corey’s co-worker lived was in the hills and her house was a bit up the hill from her neighbor’s right next to her, and it had a flat roof. “Cleopatra” liked to climb on these roofs. That’s how we first got a glimpse of her.

I remember seeing little legs and feet and then there she was. She sat on the railing on the porch and sized us up. I think that was really the only time she looked at me that day. She was too busy checking out Corey. And let me tell you, it was love at first sight. The two were immediately taken with each other. She gazed at him and he talked to her and Corey’s co-worker watched and said that she knew that Cleo had chosen him. So for a bit we just sat there and sized each other up. Corey was glowing. I’m sure I was too. I just didn’t exist. Cleo got off the railing, approached Corey and proceeded to circle his legs while brushing them with her tail. After one circle, she jumped in his lap…and Corey melted.

It was then and there we knew we were taken. That was it.

We were Cleo’s People!

And thus started a wonderful journey with our Cleo Kitty!!!!!

I love her so much!

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Moments of Peace Part 10!!! SPECIAL CLEO KITTY EDITION!

Posted on June 25, 2012 by Nahleen

I just had to share this with you!  Last night I had the most specialest wonderfulest neatest amazingest cuddle and peaceful time with our Cleo Kitty!

Ever since her diagnosis of cancer in December 2011 she has been extra lovey.  Actually, I think all three of us have become more lovey with each other and really pulled together as a family.  And Cleo Kitty is doing really well and very much alive and very much kicking these days!  She’s not only extra spunky but she is EXTRA affectionate most of the time and last night was a breathtaking example of our bonding.

She got on the table I was typing at and kept walking over my arms and in the way (OF COURSE!) trying to get my attention.  She has a habit of doing this and sometimes I’ve put my arms around her and held her and she’s put up with it but last night she not only let me hold her but she backed up into me, settled her butt on my arm and snuggled into me.  First there were no purrs but then they started too!!!

I lifted my arm away to let her know she was free if she wanted to be and she stayed right there.  It was one of the most beautiful experiences I have ever had EVER!!!  Sooooo peaceful.  This Kitty knows how to love and she teaches me more and more!

Sooooo, as usual during times with Cleo I reached for my phone (to try to get some pics and at least share with Corey) and now that I have a nice fancy one, I could turn the camera so it was facing me (not as good quality but who cares when you can catch THE moment).  I didn’t care that my hair wasn’t done “right” or that I didn’t look that good.  This was about Cleo and I and capturing our time together if possible.  What came out of it is a very special photo shoot that brings me to tears every time I look at it.  I had no idea what her facial expression was and what touches me even more is how much love she is showing so willingly on her face and usually she looks a bit irritated at me for taking pictures.  This was not the case.  I wanted to share these special Moments of Peace with you all because our little loved ones with fur instead of hair have so much to teach us and soooo much love to share.  I love her soooo much!

06/24/12 Me and My Girl! #1  She was rubbing all over me.  This is one of my favorites!

06/24/12 Me and My Girl! #2 You can’t see much of me but it’s ok.

06/24/12 Me and My Girl! #3 She sat right up to my head snuggled and let me kiss her back.

06/24/12 Me and My Girl! #4 Not the best picture but I wanted to show that I was really holding her.

06/24/12 Me and My Girl! #5 This is my favorite one! I think the picture says it all.

Thank you Cleo Kitty for the Honor of being that close to you!!!  You are truly very very special!

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