The “Cool Kids”…as if I know how they are…

I just wanted to be like the “‘Cool Kids” tonight. That’s all.

You know. The “Cool Kids”. The people who are doing stuff that is cool that I don’t get to do.

Right? Aren’t those the “Cool Kids”?

Well that’s what it feels like tonight. I did all my stretches and workouts today which is pretty darn good. I did everything I could do for me and for my health. And…

I ADDED A NEW STRETCH…

That NEW STRETCH has kicked my butt. Everything changed from that point. Even attempting this NEW STRETCH did me in. It was sooooo hard. I haven’t had to attempt such a hard stretch in a long time. Oh good. I’m glad I’m not putting the word “stretch” in capital letters anymore. It doesn’t deserve to have such Power over me. But it sure did take over my life today. Everything in my body changed at that point. I was able to keep exercising but I had to rest after trying to do the stretch and then start up again. My whole body was yelling at me. This is a new stretch given to me by my Chiropractor. I had tried to do this stretch last year with my Physical Therapist at the time and I couldn’t even get in the right position so we decided it wasn’t the “right” time to even TRY it. And now, the stretch is back to haunt me. At least I was able to get in the right position and I kinda pulled it off but it was one of the hardest things I’ve had to try in a long time.

HOLY CRAP.

I’m determined to conquer this stretch. I know it’s a good one. I know it affected my whole entire body. I’m gonna get it. I am. BUT not today.

So because of that stretch…and the fact that I have multiple sclerosis, lupus, irritable bowel syndrome and all kinds of other crappy issues that go with these three yuckies, I DON’T GET TO HANG OUT WITH THE “COOL KIDS” TONIGHT. (I know I know. Perhaps I’m the “Cool Kid” for staying home and resting and not pushing it too hard. Yeah whatever. Still not Cool. I’m not in the mood to look at the brighter side of things just yet. Sometimes I don’t want to make concessions.)

Corey has an Improv show tonight. Actually, it’s debuting tonight. Brand new and full of silly. I just know it. I love to see him up there. He looks so full of joy and really blooms on stage. Makes me happy to see him happy.

BUT NO.

MS, lupus and IBS have reared their ugly heads…YET AGAIN.

YET AGAIN…

They decide my night.

YET AGAIN…

They stop me from getting out.

YET AGAIN…

They interrupt my life.

And you know what? It’s not OK. Not tonight. I will deal. I will get some rest. Everything will happen even if I don’t get to go. I’m not as upset as I used to be about it but I’m definitely not happy either.

AND I’M TIRED OF NOT “GETTING TO GO”.

I’M TIRED OF HAVING TO SAY “NO”.

I’M TIRED OF BEING “LEFT OUT”.

I’M TIRED OF HAVING TO CALCULATE WHEN I CAN AND CAN’T DO STUFF. FUN STUFF!

And it’s when I can’t do the FUN STUFF that’s the worst.

And time will happen. I’ll have another chance to see this new show next month again. Perhaps I’ll be able to go. Maybe I’ll even be able to hang out with the “Cool Kids” and be one of them.

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