Just posted this on Facebook and thought you all might like to get an update as well…
“*A PERSONAL WRITTEN MONOLOGUE TO CATCH YOU UP ABOUT ME–THERE IS A NEWER MORE ENHANCED NAHLEEN IN TOWN:
Well today has been quite a ME DAY of rest and simplicity and I think it’s the first time EVER that I have sincerely ACCEPTED it. My body and mind were desperate to stop and breathe and I let them.
2 weeks ago (feels like an eternity–can’t believe it’s only been 2 weeks) I met with an Attorney about Appealing The Private Long Term Disability Company’s Termination of my Disability Claim. I found out I’d be/been (highly likely) judged by my online Social Media presence as a “capable” writer on my Blog, as an active Facebook participant and as someone who Tweets quite a bit on Twitter (RETWEETING–because that’s so hard to do– and helping people mostly when it came to weather and disaster news mostly), so that’s probably one of the main reasons for the Termination of Coverage….I WRESTLED with this for a week and was so incredibly devastated about it. Alllll of my feelings from the past 10 years since the MS diagnosis to Present had surfaced and the flood gates opened.
Sure my case was still highly DEFENSIBLE because HELLO I have MS and LUPUS and that DOUBLE WHAMMY IS BAD ENOUGH! HOWEVER, I felt censored, punished and like some sort of criminal for trying to have some sort of life and COMMUNITY presence in my life. And OH was I tired of FIGHTING…sooooo tired. Last week (a week after the Attorney meeting) I FINALLY had gathered up the guts to tell me, the Attorney and the whole world that I had made the decision NOT to APPEAL and it has changed ME and MY LIFE. The details will be discussed on my BLOG at a later date when I’m ready. My Blog will NOT be taken down and it will tell my whole truth now more than ever. THIS WILL BE MY ADVOCACY. THIS WILL BE MY VOICE AND HOPEFULLY INCLUDE THE VOICE OF OTHERS.
I still have to finish up the final paperwork with my Attorney so that should be interesting because she wasn’t convinced I was done and wanted to talk to me in a week. WELL, that WEEK has FINALLY arrived and I will tell you that I am in a much better place. THE BLOG is too important to me. TELLING MY STORY AND GETTING IT OUT THERE IS TOO IMPORTANT TO ME! That is how I raise awareness. That is how I’m reaching others with common issues and health problems and people in general.
I will also mention here that in the past month my path has lead me to a true Chiropractic healer who is helping me feel better in ways I have been desperately trying to get my other doctors to address AND in the past 2.5 weeks this healing journey I’m on has connected me with a Specialist who NOT ONLY was once a Social Worker, but she is now both a Psychologist and a Psychiatrist and she is reaching me in my mind in ways that no other therapist has EVER been able to do.
My point is, this past month has changed my life. I feel like I’m finally starting to become who I’m meant to be. I HAVE FLIPPED TO A NAHLEEN WHO HAS BEEN INSIDE ME AND IS NOW BEING FREED! Not only am I walking towards lightness but I am walking AWAY from darkness.
So to end this written monologue I will share pieces of quotes from some very famous people of our pasts and I guess it’s now a Nahleen quote because it makes so much sense to me, “I have chosen the path of least resistance, and that has made all the difference.”
Thank you for reading…you all mean so much to me.”
To ALL of you who have commented, sent me personal emails and joined me on this Blog path, I apologize for my lack of communication lately. I will respond as soon as I can. You are very much on my mind and I have not forgotten you.
Love,
Nahleen